Not too cute, but kinda dorky

My dad used to say that when he was a kid playing baseball he wasn’t very fast, but at least he couldn’t throw very hard either. I thought this sort of assessment could be applied to me and my dating prowess during my single years. How I look doesn’t matter so much now that I’ve locked my starting pitcher into a long-term contract, but I’m still plenty dorky.

I have a habit of getting really interested in a hobby, buying a ton of stuff to support it, and then moving on. My latest fetish has been quite long-lived though. I’ve been overly interested in boardgaming for like four years.

Now see, if I was single and made that statement you’d hear the screech of chairs on tile and the pitter patter of all the single women leaving the room. At this point in life all you hear is the barely audible sigh from my wife as she hangs her head in shame and the knowing nods of fellow wives and sisters-in-law.

To feed the fettish, one of the web sites I frequent is the aptly named Boardgamegeek. BGG is a site where each geek can rate games he owns, comments on them, post pictures, whatever. I mostly use it to find new games I might like and try to contribute to other geek’s search for The Next Game so I don’t feel like a total taker. As it turns out, I currently own nine of the top 10 rated games and 13 of the top 15. I will soon have to trim either shirts or pants from my wardrobe to make room in our closet for more games.

The reason I bring up this indiscrete little habit of mine is that I posted some time ago about the withdrawal symptoms I’d been having since my friends and family that I game with are at least eight time zones away. Well a couple of weeks ago we figured out a way to play one of our favorite games across the Internet. I know, I know. Videogaming is totally geeky. Boardgaming is even more geeky. So isn’t boardgaming on the Internet the apex of geekiness? I now hang my head in acknowledgment.

But it’s been fun.

A game that might normally take an hour or two, a couple of 2L bottles of Dr. Thunder and a bag of M&Ms now takes over a week, and the good-natured banter now happens over email or IM. But we’re having a good time. It is a pleasant break from the day to decide where to place my king once Craig finally crawls out of bed. It is a welcome addition to my morning to wake up and see if Dean’s attacking my poorly placed priest. And it’s cool that Ty’s finally back at the table since his move to SoCal.

So mock if you must, but the withdrawal symptoms are subsiding and my breathing has returned to normal – if you can call any of this normal. And if you want to get in on a game, send me an email - I won't tell your wife or girlfriend.

Looking upward

As I was rifling through the pictures we took at last week’s Halloween party, I found these two pictures of Trust’s children, Candace and Tobin, to be symbolic on a few levels.

After so many years of being less-educated, less-privileged and simply overlooked, the black children of South Africa now have the chance to look upward at new opportunities, dreams and responsibilities. It has saddened me to witness the way that power shifting in South Africa has not necessarily led to more peace, more understanding and more equitable treatment for all people. (“we have learned by sad experience that it is the nature and disposition of almost all men…”) But the dream is not dead; it is very much alive. I hope these kids continue to have much to look forward to. I hope that those that now enjoy power don’t forget the principles that put them there so the children of South Africa might continue to live with hope.

It also struck me that this is the look Trust sees each day as he greets these beautiful children. They look up to him with amazement and reverence. So do I. I marvel at his integrity, goodness and testimony in a country where so few in his circumstance have even a fraction of the same. Selfishness and greed are rampant. Life is worth less than a few cents to most – murder is commonplace; chastity is valueless – rape is prevalent. Yet a strong and good heart is able to shine through the darkness and be a light to so many, perhaps the least of whom am I.

Finally, I see in Candace’s eyes a ray of hope. Not just hope in the future that I mentioned above, but hope for me and that I will remember and find ways to lift those that look upward, that I might forget myself and reach down to lighten a load, comfort sadness or lift a discouraged or lost soul. Those that look heavenward might often find themselves looking upward into our faces if we don’t forget to look down with a smile and a steady hand. I had this same feeling and envisioned the same caption when I saw the final photo in Sebastaio Salgado’s exhibit – a child looking plaintively at the camera. I didn’t see pleading eyes; I saw a noble, emotionless call to remember. Remember.

If I recall correctly, when Brynley was asked the other day what her favorite experience so far in Africa had been, she said going to the orphanage. More than lions and rhinos and beaches and beautiful scenery, I hope this is what we all remember when Africa is a fading memory – that we came to serve, that there will always be someone to serve, that when we serve we serve our God, and in that service we find our greatest joy and fondest memories.

A Most Unusual Yankee

Lately I've taken up a new hobby - finding ways to contradict the American stereotype. Don't get me wrong - stereotypes exist for a reason. I'm not saying the average American isn't a bit too thick around the middle, a bit too oblivious to the rest of the world, a bit too focused on Nascar and the "World" Series, etc., etc. I just find it enjoyable to contradict these notions, leaving people with a confused look in their eye.

I don't think I'm really a most unusual Yankee, I just think it is fun to appear unusual to those looking for blatant conformity with a stereotype. The reality is that in a large group, every member of the group is inherently unique and unusual when compared to the average (at least when it comes to people). Hasn't the Democratic party taught us this lesson in spades? So when one appears unusual, the result is that people start to wonder whether the stereotype is correct or not. In Stockholm I had a few friends tell me they thought American TV, especially shows like Jerry Springer, are psychological warfare aimed at making the rest of the world underestimate us, to make them think we're a whole lot dumber than they are. I suspect they do underestimate it us, though it's possible we're every bit as dumb as they think we are.

So here are some gems I drum up in conversations these days. Hi I'm John. I'm American and:
* I speak three languages. I've worked on two or three others, but they kinda stink.
* I'd like to learn Zulu.
* I can drive a manual transmission
* I can see my shoes
* I don't watch much TV
* I don't like Bush either (this one's a trick statement - this actually makes me quite American at the moment)
* I wrote my congresswoman asking her to vote against war in Iraq
* I prefer rugby. I dislike cricket.
* I'm fine driving on the left side of the road. I just hope I don't have to "react" - not sure I'll swerve the right direction.
* I wish I was being paid in Euros or pounds instead of the American peso right now
* I have six kids (ok, this one draws looks of disbelief regardless of nationality)
* I believe in chastity before marriage (I don't bring this one up often, but it is probably the most staggering departure from American cultural images)
* I don't know your cousin that lives in New Jersey (this is actually a useful one in Latin America - most don't have a great sense of distance in the US)
* I don't really like McDonald's or KFC. I think I've eaten them more abroad than in the US. I'm pretty sure the last time I ate KFC was in Vietnam. If you had Wendy's and Taco Bell you might have me though.
* I have Muslim friends. And Jewish ones. And black ones. And Mexican ones. Even some Christian ones, but they think I'm going to hell.
* I have a passport. In fact, it's almost full (big goal of mine).
* I would like to use less gas.

I'll have to think of others. This whole thing started one night at dinner when the senior partner on my case, a German and head of our high tech practice in Europe, said to me sometime during dinner, "You're most unusual." I felt unusual. He's a huge wine drinker. His wine cellar is probably worth more than the house I just sold. I told him I don't drink. He was dumbfounded. After several seconds he replied, "But wine is drinking." In that case, I am definitely unusual.

True Chaos

Katie's blog has chaos in the title, but I've been thinking lately that the word is far more appropriate in describing mine.

Most blogs are written routinely, have a theme, a tone, a consistent voice. Mine has none of the above. My writing is at best conversational, bordering on glib. I post frequently at times, extremely infrequently at others. I write on things serious, possibly funny, possibly irresponsible.

Most other blogs I read give me what I'm expecting. When I read Dean's post I know not to take a drink of milk. When I read Katie's post I prepare to be enlightened. Etc. etc.

Every amusement park and carnival seems to have a few rides in common and one of these was known as the Wild Mouse at the amusement park near my childhood home (ah, Lagoon). It's the ride that looks like a miniature rollercoaster, but is really just an excuse to grab each rider by the collar and jerk him back and forth, up and down until he cries uncle. Nice touch of irony - this is the ride Porter wanted to most go on when were at California adventure with Tyler. Porter cried a lot of uncle during the ride, but afterward wanted to go again.

You, my reader, must feel a lot like this at times. I'd apologize, but it's the way the ride's designed. I hope after calling uncle, you might want to go again.

Halloween in Africa

Halloween is not a big deal in South Africa. Few celebrate it and those that do don't trick-or-treat or carve jack-o-lanterns. However, Katie wanted the kids to still have a great time and perhaps have a chance to meet new people and serve them in a small way.

Katie is very good at throwing parties and loves to do so, but I don't think she's ever bitten off something quite this big. Friday afternoon we had 50 kids in our house, along with many of the parents. What a crowd. She organized a Halloween party, complete with traditional activities - trick or treating, bobbing for apples, ghost in the graveyard, decorating cookies and donuts on a string. Most of the kids had never seen anything like it.

My favorite part was the idea the kids came up with for costumes (well, at least the girls). They decided to dress as different Africa tribes, in traditional dress. Here they are:

Katie was Pedi. Legend has it that the Pedis were defeated by a Scottish army because they didn't attack, believing they were women. Now they wear kilts like the one Katie's wearing. The men are actually the ones that wear the kilts. The women don't wear much at all. Katie was willing to let authenticity slide a bit. Note the boots - those are traditional Pedi (and Basotho) as well - they were some of the first to work in the mines



Mason and Porter were rastafarian. I guess. Not so traditional, but they felt cool.





Bryn was Zulu (the most common group here in Joburg). They actually usually wear a different dress hat, but she liked this one better.



Madi was Ndbele, who are related to the Zulus and are on the border with Zimbabwe. Trust is Ndbele. They are known for their beads, their colorful homes and the metal bands the women wear on their arms, legs and necks so they won't run away from their husbands. I've thought of getting some for Katie - just in case. The loin cloth Madi has on is a big deal - handmade by an Ndbele woman, this would be framed in the main room of her house.



Molly is Basotho, which is the tribe that lives in Lesotho. They wear these conical hats (feels like Vietnam) and the gummy boots like the Pedi, who are closely related.



Lucy's costume is my favorite. We didn't have one for her earlier this week. Evie asked what all the girls were going to dress as. Evie loves Lucy. Evie's also Xhosa (so's Nelson Mandela). She asked if she could make Lucy a costume. This is what she made. Absolutely wonderful. I wonder if she felt a bit miffed that none of the kids had chosen to be Xhosa.



We had a bit of an adventure last weekend. Trust took us into downtown Joburg. Since the end of apartheid, the whites have almost entirely left the downtown area, so we stuck out like a sore thumb. Two white people holding hands with their six kids, walking along the hustle and bustle of a totally black city center. We got the rest of the items we needed for the costumes and took off. I wish I would have felt comfortable taking my camera out to take a picture of the family in the midst of this, but I didn't think it wise.

So here's out festive Halloween crew.

Dance, dance, dance

Bryn and Madi choreographed this dance yesterday. Crappy video, but there you go.

Family night

We try to spend Monday evenings together as a family to have fun and take the chance to teach the kids a thing or two. This week Katie was trying to teach the family about the importance of serving our neighbors and the kids were all over the place. I was sitting on a few, had a couple of others in a headlock, but just couldn't get them to relax for a few minutes and listen. Finally I gave in and decided I should just record this for posterity. No one will ever blame our kids for being too quiet. I call this like clip "Reverently, Quietly".

Maybe Texas isn't so bad after all

One thing Katie and I dread about Texas is the suffocating summer heat and humidity. I saw in the Trib today that Utah is contributing to and suffering from global greenhouse warming more than any state in the union. Perhaps we got out just in time? Enjoy the drought back there! :)

My Favorite Weekend

Most belief systems seem to have certain times of the year they hold special or sacred - Ramadan, Lent, Hanukkah, Dawali, March Madness, etc. I love several different holidays. Some I hold sacred (Christmas, Easter) and others I really enjoy (Thanksgiving, Halloween, playoffs). But this weekend is quite unique for me. Twice a year I get the chance to listen to men I believe to be inspired and try to find nuggets in their messages that will make me a better person.

I've spent the last week or two reading the 21 messages from April to prepare myself to learn more this time. Each conference seems to have a central theme or special event. Last time the tabernacle was rededicated. Today we'll sustain a new apostle and member of the first presidency.

As I've read, I've been struck by how profound many messages were last time. I'm a sucker for ratings, so here I give you a short thought from what for me were the top five discourses given last time.

5.
"What do you do when you have prepared carefully, have prayed fervently, waited a reasonable time for a response, and still do not feel an answer? You may want to express thanks when that occurs, for it is evidence of his trust." - Scott

4.
"The best way to avoid divorce from an unfaithful, abusive, or unsupportive spouse is to avoid marriage to such a person."
"Often the cause [of divorce] is not incompatibility but selfishness. The first step is not separation but reformation." - Oaks

3.
"I make you two promises. Hard as things seem today, they will be better in the next day if you choose to serve the Lord this day with your whole heart. Your circumstances may not be improved in all the ways which you desire. But you will have been given new strength to carry your burdens and new confidence that when your burdens become too heavy, the Lord, whom you have served, will carry what you cannot. He knows how. He prepared long ago. He suffered your infirmities and your sorrows when He was in the flesh so He would know how to succor you.
"The other promise I make you is that by choosing to serve Him this day, you will feel His love and grow to love Him more." - Eyring

2.
"Hearing of this tragedy, many people sent money to the Amish to pay for the health care of the five surviving girls and for the burial expenses of the five who were killed. As a further demonstration of their discipleship, the Amish decided to share some of the money with the widow of the milkman and her three children because they too were victims of this terrible tragedy." - Faust

1.
"No misfortune is so bad that whining won't make it worse."
"Out of the same mouth proceedeth blessing and cursing. My brethren, these things ought not so to be." - Holland

Honorable Mentions:
Decade of Decision - Hales
Pickles - Bednar
Repentance and Conversion - Nelson

My Picks:
H. David Burton
L. Tom Perry

Kung Fu Man

Today's big deal is that Porter got to start karate lessons, taught by none other than our kind bishop. I don't think he's ever been so psyched. Check out how mean this guy is.



And of course whatever's cool for Porter must be really, really cool for Molly and Lucy.




You know how Macs are supposed to be so user friendly and great with images? The sideways pictures above beg to differ. I'll be blogging on my own computer from now one. Edit: OK, I got the pictures rotated, but the video's still sideways. *sigh*

Anyone know how to rotate a video on YouTube? *grrr*

This could easily be me and Ferg

The Risk reference was only saved by the fact that he considered staying for Kamchatka.

How Can I Get Any Work Done Around Here?

Not only is South Africa in the elimination rounds of the rugby world cup, but they are practically a shoe-in for the final the way things worked out. First they get Fiji (patsy) and then the winner of Argentina/Scotland. Are you kidding me? Sweet! Tangent - did anyone else see that dude with the ridiculous name outrun Brian Habana for the US try? The US could have lost by 100 points and it would have been ok after that. Huge respect points here in the RSA for that run (of course, I believe he's from Zim as are half the people in RSA). I wish they could field a team from the NFL for this. They might not win, but surely you'd see more sick runs like that if LaDainian Tomlinson and Randy Moss were your flyhalf and wing, no?



Not only did the Cubs win the pennant (perhaps it would be more appropriate to say the Brewers lost it), but they are playing Arizona (I thought that was just where the Cubs had spring training - apparently they have their own crappy team). If the Cubs' bats keep blazing this could be a great second season.

But I can't watch the Cubs in South Africa! And the Boks are playing on conference Sunday. Ack!

Fun time for sports around here. If the Jazz would just trade the crier for The Matrix I'd have the trifecta going.